Never Ask Open-Ended Questions in Cross
Just received this by email. A quick Google check shows that this one’s been floating around on the Internet at least since 2002, but I’ll pass it along anyway. The email I received labeled this as: “Best Comeback Line Of The Year.”
Felony trial. Defense attorney cross-examining police officer.
Q: “Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?”
A: “No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.”
Q: “Officer, who provided this description?”
A: “The officer who responded to the scene.”
Q: “A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender? Do you trust your fellow officers?”
A: “Yes sir. With my life.”
Q: “With your life? Let me ask you this then, Officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?”
A: “Yes sir, we do.”
Q: “And do you have a locker in the room?”
A: “Yes sir, I do.”
Q: “And do you have a lock on your locker?”
A: “Yes sir.”
Q: “Now why is it, Officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?”
A: “You see, sir, we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.”
